Feeling good, feeling great!

I went on a sugar high yesterday.
Mr.S gave me the second half of my allowance which was a bit more than I expected, it always is. gosh I love that man lol. Have him sprung.
An ex-SD was on a business trip in my town and asked me out which I totally jumped on. I wanted to impress him and make him eat his heart out. Did he? yes he did. I had him wrapped around my finger the whole night. He was smiling, talking about what a beautiful  woman I'm becoming, looking mature blah blah blah. He know how to spoil me, very well. Walked away with quite a bit. He's investing in a business over here and might come to my town more often so we talked about maybe seeing each other again if he does. He have an SB girlfriend (legit girlfriend), with whom he doesn't think things will last. he's in NY so, if anything I would def pawn him off to an SB in that area.

My day entailed of spending a 3hr sex, cuddle, talk, session with Mr.S, then I met with my ex. I orgasms so many times in one day that I loved it! my body felt sooo good!

Tonight no sugar dating, my future ex husband asked me out. I totally didn't have to ask him first cause he got to it before me. I think I have him in a good spot right now, We might go out for dinner. He call me sugar when he text me !! I wonder if I can mold him into an SD, don't really want to. he's perfect just being my future ex husband. I'm going to try my best not to ravage him cause gosh I wanna fuck him...and my neighbor...I need to make a wish fuck list....seriously.

Have a good weekend sugars!!

On a sugar high

This week have been exhausting and busy. I had my apartment furnished when moved in, and just decided to buy my own furniture, courtesy of Mr.S of course. We have been shopping relentlessly this week. I'm redecorating my whole apartment, and choosing different colors and make it more girly and fun. I'm psyched! but would have like it much better if I had a designer do it all lol. While shopping, it kind of felt like he was shopping for himself also, checking out manly living room sets and sofas. I told him he still have 13 more years to go on his marriage (he said before he probably won't leave till kids are off to college) but at the store he said 13 years is too long. I don't need him single, it would be weird and probably expect more from me. I'm still car shopping also, well haven't physically looked at anything just browsed online.

Regular dating:
I had an amazing date last night. He remind me a lot of Mr.S, young, good looking, motivated, successful, business owner but SINGLE! We met for a drink, he picked me up in his Benz, he was dressed very well. I was looking good, MK jacket, loubs, and my prada bag in hand lol. He's 31, in the Finance biz, have his own company which is cool. He lives in a 6 bedroom house with one roommate. We had a good time together. He called me an old soul, I know I'm mature for my age. I got a little tipsy, and kind of talked a WHOLE lot lol. but he texted me after dropping me off, saying we should do it again. I so want to sleep with him. He is deff future ex husband material. I might take it to ask him for a second date before someone else snatch him.

This guy on Match I've been talking to on and off asked me out next week. He's 40, a lawyer, 2 kids I  think, divorced, but really good looking. He seem a little plain to me but I'm giving it a shot.

Pots:
I'm getting a lot of messages in AM. I hate how I have to keep my pics in a private showcase. Don't want Mr.S to see me on there if he ever check. I have 2 pots i'm meeting with next week from there. And i'm talking to a pot from CL who i'm about to cut off, we have a date tomorrow but he's annoying the living hell out of me. He's seriously wasting my time and I'm not up for that. Right now, it's so hard to really find anyone and you have to really put in the work. If i find a pot who offers 2500K and up I'm good with that.

I have a HUGE crush on my neighbor across from me. We bump into each other all the time. I think he works from home cause I always spy on him and see him a lot during the day. He have bump into me and Mr.S coming and out of my apartment before and men was it awkward lol. Last night, my druken ass took a napkin, pulled out my red lipstick and wrote "I think you're hot" and add on my apartment #. I tried sliding it under his door but the napkin was too thick lmfao. I took it back and went to bed. I want to have one night with him, just one night. He's older, tall, muscles, sooo hottt!!! The things i would do to that man.

Quick Update

I finally took the liberty of creating a FB SB page, I was kind of against it for a long time cause I didn't see the purpose of it. But lately I've been meaning to have SB girlfriends in my area, but gosh, they are so reserved. Maybe I come on too strong but I'm all about having fun, having fun sb girls to shop, eat, party and chase IRL SD's would be  a blast!

My FB is Lisa Bentley SB
would love some new friends!

AM haven't been working for me how I thought it would like last time. I find that there are so many young people in there, maybe it's just my area. I don't wanna deal with another 30 year old married guy, I'd rather he be older. I haven't had any new pots come my way for awhile. I've been emailing back and forth but you can tell when it just isn't going anywhere. I hate when you message a guy, they read it, and take about a week or more to answer while they're on the site every given hour! It makes me feel like they're waiting for something better to come along. I'm not desperate so when they reply I let it go. Maybe i'm letting my ego in the way a bit but I find it so disrespectful.
Sugar hunting takes so much time and energy! I think us sugars need to figure out new marketing strategies or something because these men are not budging! Maybe this will be a minor project of mine. I find it so weird how they stay on the sites for years after years (been in the sugar world for a little over 3 years) most of the sites have the same guys that's always been on there. They're missing the chance of meeting so many incredible ladies for whatever reason.

I'm planning on ordering some business cards, told one of my college girlfriends we should do some networking events together. I'm not particularly looking for a job, I calculated my yearly salary with Mr.S and it's almost doubled what I'd be making in a job coming straight out of college. I just need to learn money managing skills and pay bills on time. I would love to attend some high end events with a girlfriend and just hand out my cards to good looking wealthy professionals.  Mr.S invited me to this outlet mall with him this week to go underwear shopping, of course I said yes. Most time we go shopping together we always manage to sneak in a quickie in the dressing room lol. I checked out the stores online to see what I want to get for myself, might get a few new outfits. He like me dressing preppy, but i like sexy and sophisticated. So my wardrobe is very blended.

We went to the Casino last weekend. I'm not a big gambler but I always gamble with him. He gave me $500 to use for blackjack, only thing we play. I ended up tripling the 500! I had about $1700, I should have listen to the saying Quit While you're ahead! Lol. I ended up losing it all. Lesson learned, then he gave me more money and went on a losing streak.

Never really cared for VDay...

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"I'm a Safety Girl"-Viviane/Pretty Woman

I'm talking to a pot who does not want to share a picture due to work and he's married.

I've always turned down guys who wouldn't share a pic before, but I don't want to seem so picky anymore.

Have anyone met a pot before without exchanging pics? Of course we would meet in a public place, but you never know.

Untitled

Thanks all for the birthday wishes!
Happy Mistress Day to all the mistresses!

I had an amazing bday but ended up losing my purse and phone at the club. whoever find my purse will be one happy person with the cash that was on there lol. But I didn't let any of that get in my way I had a great time and felt so much love from my friends. Everything in there is replaceable.
I'm back at my place and deff need the down time after such heavy partying. Mr.S and I plan on celebrating my bday sometime this week. He mentioned going to the casino for a night, we might do that. It's also our 2 year anniversary, he haven't say anything about Vday...we celebrated last year. This year no word yet, but I really don't care for it. I'd love some diamonds lol I'll accept any gifts!
I wanted to get him a burberry scarf and a new wallet but if he doesn't say a word about it I won't either.
As for my car, he said he will put a "nice chunk" for a down payment :) I'm psyched! I decided to do the smart thing, I'm getting a used car not high on mileage and not more than about 4 yrs old. If he put a nice chunk down and he's making my payments I'll be able to pay it off. I don't want our relationship to end and for me to have a 60K car hanging over my head. I've been looking online and checking out what I'd look amazing in. My friend said a car is like an outfit, you have to try it on, take a pic and see how you look with it LOL I agree.

During the weekend, my ex bf who I havent talk to in so long called me. We had a 3 year on and off relationship while in college, it wasn't the healthiest relationship I've had. We disagreed a lot but he always had me coming back to him and vice versa. during the summer, before my big move he contacted me after 7months of not talking and wanted to know if we can patch things up and start seeing each other again. I was so angry at him during that time that I told him off. We have almost a 3hr drive between us and I don't know how it would work. I think deep down I still love him and he still love me but idk. I guess a FWB thing could work for us, but he ask for too much. He wants me to be exclusive even tho we're not a couple, like I can't see anyone else or date. Thats one reason I walked away from him last time. How do you balance a boyfriend and the sugar world?? I did it for a few months and it wasn't working for me. Plus i love my sugar life too much to give up any of it yet. I think one thing that I didn't like about him was that he had no motivation to better himself. He graduated school after 5 years, when we were going out he spent almost a year without a job and he was flat broke. Barely had money to take me on dates and all of that. I'm not a gold digger but I know if I'm ever to end up with a guy who doesn't work hard and have that "chase that paper" mentality i won't be completely happy. I want the best for us and our future. The guy doesn't have to be a millionaire but I want a comfortable life. He's only 3 years older than me, and I used to always said I wish he was older. I really just love older men and tired and done with the young boys.

23---feeling like an old hag

The feeling is probably just temporary lol. But when you're moving up and up past 21 you can't help but drown in your sorrow. 

Either way my bday celebration  is this weekend, I have a lot planned and I'm psyched! 

The search for a new SD is freaking hard! Men barely respond to messages, maybe it's just me. Men I've known to be in the sites for more than a year are still there, I feel like they think so highly of themselves and that they deserve a lot. Dude, if you're still not meeting someone after a year, get over yourself! I sent out messages, but I'm trying to not be picky about messages I received. I feel like at this point in the sugar world, you have to be very open minded or you will be doing a whole lot of searching. No more men who are not married, or under 40, and so on. But one thing I won't compromise is my allowance. I know what I'm worth and won't go below it. 

Mr.S cancelled our work day...again. came over around 1, left around 3. Felt like he's been doing that a lot. I know he's busy with work and everything but one thing I despise is when he make me feel like a pro. He ask and mention all the time how he doesn't want to feel like a client, well karma's a bitch. If you're going to make me feel like a pro, you WILL feel like a client. Sex haven't been great, i kind of just lay there. or get on top and ride with my face buried on his shoulder. No Emotions. I feel like every girl have a point where they complain about not spending much time with their SD lol when in the beginning they were trying to dodge him as much as they could HAHA

I always make him finish and I think he's been happy with just that. He came over to "supposedly" talk about going out for my bday next week, and talk about the car--which I didn't bring up after that night. He wants to maybe go to a casino. He didn't bring up the car and neither did I. But he gave me some really good cash as a pre bday gift which I'm not mad about. Going straight to my student loans or my credit card.

I'm going to enjoy my weekend, and have a blast! and hope all you sugars enjoy yours! Muah! =)

Blackmailing

I was thinking about this earlier today before seeing Mr.S
Everything haven't been a walk in the park with us lately and to be honest, who knows what's going to happen.
I kept thinking about the exit package he offered me when things end. Whether things end in a good or bad way he said he'll keep his words. Do I believe him? Yes/No. 50/50.
In that case I thought about what do other SB's do to protect themselves? If you know your SD have a chance of screwing you over what actions would you take if he does so?
Mr.S and I have built a great friendship and bond between us, but I'm not stupid. I'm dealing with a married man, a liar and a cheater. But I've also found him to be an amazing and loving person.

Before our relationship, he had an SB of about 6 months who tried to blackmail him for a great amount of money. He had to bring his lawyer into the situation and after a threatening letter from his lawyer to her, she eventually dropped everything. Would I ever blackmail an SD for $$$$? NO. that is a very low move and a lot of SD's are way smarter than that.

What I would I do if Mr.S ever screw me?
Screwing me means, suddenly leaving me for another SB when he claim he wasn't looking (after 2 yrs together). Screwing me means, not following with the exit package he offered me. Screwing me means, not helping me look for a job after things end like he promised. Screwing me means a lot of different things, such, that would break the bond between us and not be able to have a follow up friendship after things end. I don't believe in burning bridges, he's been a big deal in my life, so Whenever one of us want to end things I hope we can be cordial and still amicable towards each other.




~Revenge is a Dish best Served Cold~

Living on a Prayer

I try to go to church almost every sunday. This sunday before going I stopped at my mailbox and found a nice student loan bill of almost 5K waiting for me. I opened it and felt so lost, My student loans are coming out from every corner and really need to consolidate them or I'll be paying almost 1K a month. I could not focus at church, I somehow found myself praying for a new SD who will take care of my loans LOL. I was legit praying for like 2 new SD's and doing the math in my head, at church.---I'm going to hell.

The past few days I've found a lot of comfort in reading other SB's blogs who are doing so well with two or more SD's. If you have an SD dishing out 10K or more just cause you ask him to help with something, and he does, that is a keeper. I felt inspired today, and decided to pay for a membership on SD.com that is an investment of $50. I'm hoping to find if not one but 2 more SD's that I can get from 3-5K a month from. I try to aim for men with an income of 250K-1M. What he makes really reflect on how much he can or wiling to help. If I can accumulate 10K a month between two or 3 SD's that'd be perfect. I have the time and can manage my schedule pretty well. It's just the SEARCH!!! It's so hard finding one with everyone claiming to be a SB.

I don't know why I'm so honest with Mr.S but if I tell him it's only him I'm seeing he will figure it out. He's making fake profiles and he knows what kind of men I target so who knows he'll probably try to message me and see if I'm being honest or not. I plan on telling him the week after this one that I'm choosing to see other SD's and not taking him on his offer. His offer was appealing until my student loans started bombarding me the chance of me getting a new car with all these bills and be able to save will be impossible. When or if I'm done with the sugar world, I hope to come out of it close to completely debt free. Speaking of the devil--Mr.S, just texted me. haven't talk to him all weekend. except for friday morning when my cable was turned off cause he forgot to pay my bill. He's getting to be unreliable, he received so many strikes from me already and it's only the beginning of the month. only thing about him is he keep his words when it comes to my allowance.

I hope there isn't a drought in the sugar bowl cause I'm ready to dive in!

NO Expectations=NO Disappointment

This is a good quote to live by in life, especially in the sugar world. I hate the feeling when you first start talking with a pot and he sounds perfect and you start daydreaming about what it will be like to have him in your life and you set high expectations and only for him not to turn out what you thought he would be. Hate being disappointed.

I had the feeling these past few days and it isn't great. I didn't get to make dinner for Mr.S, we had a talk during the day, he started babbling about if I wanted a car to get us to the city and go boozing, then he mentioned we should just eat out cause it would make sense, then I got mad and said fuck it, we can do whatever. Long story short, my plans were screwed and his plans came into play. He mentioned how he never drive into the city when we're going out because wife's brother is a cop and he doesn't want to get pull over if he have a few drinks on him and the guy don't like him already. He told me at first he wanted a chill night without doing anything over the top, I didn't want to go out drinking but I think thats what he wanted to do all along. I went through a lot of trouble to plan a candle lit dinner and I don't do any of that shit often, so this was the last romantic thing he will see from me. 

The whole time he was over I was getting ready, he was just getting high and drinking a lot. I don't mind it, I usually join him in but I was still pissed. I didn't want to drink, cause when I do I get emotional and will just spit out everything to him. When the limo came he grabbed a bottle of champagne from my fridge and took it with him. In the limo I had a good amount of champagne, got a little tipsy and relaxed a bit. We got to the place and it looked like a shit hole. It was soooo small with like 7 tables, no bar, the decor was nice but it was so tiny. I guess more of a romantic setting? well not really there was only one more couple of twos there. The rest looked like professionals meeting for dinner after work. The food was disgusting, the menu was small, didn't like anything I ordered. We shared a duck for two and it tasted horrible. Only thing I did was drink wine, they didn't even have cocktails--no bar. I was over the whole thing. he kept saying how he felt like a jackass, blah blah blah. 

We got to talking about my bday and thats when things went downhill. I told him I wanted to get a new car just like we agreed about a month ago. He asked if I wanna lease it, I said no. To be honest I was drunk and barely remember how the convo went. We went back and forth about it, then he started talking about if this ends he doesn't want to end up paying X amount for the car, he doesn't want anything on his name, he doesn't want to put like a big amount of a down payment, he doesn't want to put his card down for monthly payments. He suggest that I get a used car. I asked him if he would help me look, go to different dealerships, he even said no to that. With everything he was saying I asked him if he doesn't trust me, don't remember what he said but I kept repeating it, then the water works started. I had a few tears--then Scene. I was fine, I told him it's ok, then I brushed it off but he kept wanting to go back to it. In the end, We paid for a dinner that none of us barely touch, he was drunk and high, I was drunk but could control myself, went back home, was in bed by 9:50. The whole thing had me piss, we barely get to spend a whole day/night with each other and that's what happened. He usually live up to my expectations, or better, so this was a low blow. Especially since he have never said no to me before about anything I've asked. And he was so harsh about things, not sure if it was the drinking and smoking but he was not sincere. 

The next day, I decided to make the best out of it. Had some morning sex, then made us a big breakfast cause I knew he was starving. We acted as if last night didn't happen. I really didn't want to get into it. ate, cuddled, watched Pretty Woman together, had sex. After, we got dressed and went to Dave & Buster's. It was fun, it was what we needed after such an intense night. He gave me the first half of my allowance--the only good thing that happened, oh and that I discovered a new way of riding his dick lol which had him screaming OMG. 

I heard that a way to a man's heart is through his stomach...is it the same path to his wallet???

I've never imagined myself being the traditional housewife type--doing extreme cleaning, cooking, and whatever else the hell they do.
I still can't imagine being the motherly type--I'm still not sure about having kids, and if i ever do, I better have some kind of nanny.
BUT I like making dinners for two, or baking for my a man, when i know he's special enough and deserve it.
I'm not one that can "throw down" in the kitchen lol but I can do a little something. And some dishes I can do pretty well.

Mr.S and I are spending today/night together so I took charge and planned our evening. He was going to make reservations somewhere i proposed the idea that I'll cook, then there's this amazing dessert place in the city where we can go for dessert and wine (after he have me as his main dessert of course).

My menu for dinner  is fresh mozzarella, tomato, avocado basil salad as a light appetizer. I have fresh dinner rolls with extra virgin olive oil, main course is baked salmon in white wine sauce with side dishes of asparagus and sauté spinach. I'm serving white wine with dinner and maybe a few cocktails. It will be a candle lit dinner, so I'm making it very special.
Also making him breakfast in the morning, I love making mimosa and he loves it cause I add mango sorbet to it and make it taste sooooo much better! We plan on going to the movies, maybe I'll sneak in the mall in there, I need some new make up.

Ok, so i'm buttering him up a little for my bday gift LOL I want to start shopping around for a new car, he haven't asked me what I want for my bday yet but the answer is on the tip of my tongue. A NEW CAR! Even though it is part of our deal and he agreed on it, but I broke our agreement with him finding me on the SD sites, so I think he might bring that up. But he really shouldn't have a problem with it, plus he just told me he closed a million dollar deal. Anyone ever had an SD purchase a car? I would like it paid in full, although I'm pretty sure that won't happen lol, a girl can dream. But if anyone did, did he have it on his name or yours? monthly payments?

I had a second date with the young-lawyer-to-be. He's so sexy looking ahhhh just wanted to eat him. He proposed the idea of a movie, so I had him over at my place. We had a few beers and watched one of my dvd's. halfway through the movie he jumped on me and we had a heavy make out session. before I knew it I was topless and bra less. he unbutton my pants and that's when I pushed him away. Really wasn't down to have sex with him, to me, it seems like that might be all he want. It's what I want BUT I want him to take me on a real date before he can get in them jeans. before he left, I gave him a hug, before i knew it my legs were wrapped around him and we were making out, I love when a guy hold me like that. He's 6'4, I'm 5'3 so yeah lol.  I'm excited for these few days with Mr.S, although my lovely period decided to show up, but will make the best of it.

Happy Black History Month Sugars!